Skip to main content icon/video/no-internet
icon backReturn to Entries

Widows

A widow is a woman whose husband has died. The word widow comes from Sanskrit, meaning lonely or solitary. Widow is one of the only words in English for which the feminine form is the root word and the masculine constructed with a suffix. This is significant because after a husband dies, we continue to associate widows with their husbands. It is quite common to hear a woman referred to as John's widow, but the converse, Mary's widower, sounds awkward.

This entry describes how women experience widowhood in North America in terms of income, relationships, and living alone. It then looks briefly at widowhood in other parts of the world.

Demographic Aspects of Widowhood

According to the U.S. Census Bureau, there were 11,288,000 widows in the United States in 2003. Its 2005-07 American Community Survey reported that 32 percent of women over 65 were widows. By the age of 65, the proportion rises to 44 percent. As Anne Martin-Matthews observed, widowhood for women is an expectable event. There are large numbers of widows for two reasons. First, women on average outlive men by about five years. Second, wives are, on average, two years younger than their husbands. Older widows are unlikely to remarry, both because there are so many more single older women than men, and because most do not want to remarry.

Widows are likely to experience a sharp decrease in their income and may experience poverty for the first time in their lives. Men's pensions often disappear when they die, and older widows are unlikely to have their own pensions. This situation may improve in the future because of women's increased labor-force participation. Nonetheless, women make less than men and are more likely to have interrupted work careers and to work part time in order to care for children or other relatives.

Widows often grieve deeply when their partners die. They report experiencing shock and numbness in the early days of widowhood and appreciate large turnouts at their husbands’ funerals.

Widows’ Relationships

Older widows have to negotiate relationships with adult children, friends, and men. They report close relationships with their children, who sometimes become overprotective, particularly their sons. Widows work to maintain a sense of reciprocity with their children. Widows almost universally report losing friends. They often think that these friends had really been their husband's rather than their own friends. Widows believe that it is their responsibility to keep up appearances when around their friends, that is, not appear too sad or talk about their husbands too much. Widows often become friends with a group of widows and socialize together. Many feel uncomfortable being single women among couples and describe society as a “couples’ world.” Finding friends is especially challenging for young widows, because they have few age peers who share their experience. Increasing numbers of divorced and ever-single women may alleviate this situation.

Widows may find relationships with men challenging. They often worry about sending the wrong message about interest in remarriage and about changed mores regarding dating and sexual intimacy. Widows often do not want to remarry, because they want to remain loyal to their husbands and/or because they do not want to take care of another man. Widows who do not want to remarry often continue to wear their wedding ring for protection. Particularly in Europe, widows may establish couple relationships called “living apart together” or LAT, which is exclusive and intimate but does not involve living together.

...

  • Loading...
locked icon

Sign in to access this content

Get a 30 day FREE TRIAL

  • Watch videos from a variety of sources bringing classroom topics to life
  • Read modern, diverse business cases
  • Explore hundreds of books and reference titles

Read next

More like this

Sage Recommends

We found other relevant content for you on other Sage platforms.

close

Have you created a personal profile? Login or create a profile so that you can save clips, playlists and searches

close
close
close Signed In to profile You are signed in as:
close
Logged in Institution Institution