Same-Sex Intimate Partner Violence

Similarities

The types of abuse in same-sex and heterosexual relationships are the same in that the abuse may be verbal, psychological, physical, sexual, or financial. The patterns of behavior of the abusive person, the threats and isolation, and the fact that battering occurs across racial-ethnic, social class, and religious groups are also the same. Abusers in same-sex relationships feel the same entitlement as heterosexual abusers do; they also choose to abuse their partners while often blaming [Page 623]their partners, the children's behavior, stress at work, or alcohol for their abuse. Domestic violence can be lethal, regardless of sex of the perpetrator or victim. Child witnesses to domestic violence are affected similarly, regardless of the sex of their parents.

Differences

Victims of same-sex IPV have fewer services and less support available to them than heterosexual victims do. Not only might the LGBT survivor be isolated from family and friends because of the control of the abusive person, but also he or she might be concealing his or her homosexual relationship. Furthermore, LGBT communities have often been silent about domestic and sexual violence, adding to the sense of isolation of the survivor. There is little spoken or written about same-sex sexual violence, so the vast majority of survivors do not seek help after a sexual assault. This reaction differs from a heterosexual woman raped by a man, who may call a rape crisis center or law enforcement. A major difference, therefore, is that a survivor of same-sex violence has to “come out” about his or her relationship in a societal environment that questions the legitimacy of these relationships. Isolation is also extended to friendship circles-the LGBT subcommunity is often small within the towns or cities where LGBT people live, and a survivor often cannot confide in a friend. This friend is often friends with the abusive person as well.

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