Shame

Shame is a double-edged sword. It is a rich emotion that evokes both the moral consciousness necessary for maintaining social order (enforcing self-valuation in relation to self-discretion, modesty, and belonging) and repercussions from personal struggles involving dishonor, humiliation, or ridicule. Shame is, on one side, externally evident in the explicit judgmental reactions from others (sometimes a form of punishment to diminish or to reflect failures or shortcomings), and on the other side, internally evident in the way people judge themselves (self-critical of actions, thoughts, feelings, or characteristics). Thus, shame has the power to direct people's behavior, form identities, evaluate social acceptability, and influence attachments to others. This entry examines shame as it relates to trauma victims.

The expression of shame appears to be contextual. Shame seems to keep an individual's behavior in line within cultural norms that further the survival of the group and can stop people from behaving in ways that might be harmful to them, their family, or their community. In collectivist cultures, the idea of shaming seems to be more pervasive and tends to involve a wider range of feelings such as shyness, embarrassment, uncertainty, or even hurt. A person may avoid disclosing something that may [Page 622]feel shameful to someone else to avoid any personal or social embarrassment. Thus, shaming has strong cultural components and is generally used to socialize people in cultural norms through evoking feelings about sexuality, etiquette, and emotional expression.

People normally observe and experience social signals that evoke shame as a means of regulating behavior (compliance to morally correct behavior). When unspoken or spoken signals about appropriate behavior are shared among people, feelings of embarrassment are aroused or somebody else is seen to be embarrassed. People may show signals of shamed feelings through the bent head, averted eyes, and attempts to escape the painful gaze of others to avoid being the object of attention. People generally watch for or anticipate these types of signals in interactions so they can avoid (or sometime increase) shaming experiences, or to establish a moral direction for behavior. If there is unbearable shame in being exposed in this way, a person can feel very vulnerable and tend toward being completely self-focused and may even be unable to think clearly, speak freely, or take action in a situation. Excessive or prolonged shaming can manifest in struggles with emotional regulation and create enduring problems in personal and intrapersonal interactions.

Shame has also been linked to specific types of psychopathology and can vary from mild to severe (from feeling slighted to feeling dehumanized). Researchers Marcela Matos and José Pinto-Gouveia have shown significant connections between shame and depression. Specifically, adults with childhood trauma with related shaming experiences tend to have high self-criticism, which has been shown to be a predictor of adjustment and related to a higher lifetime risk of depression. Low self-esteem is also related to a loss of energy and feelings of defeat and powerlessness (characteristics related to depression). Shame and shaming related to the body have been connected to depression symptoms. Further, researcher Dianne Trumbull explains that extreme self-contempt may be a catalyst for suicide intent—repeated shaming can eliminate a person's perception of positive self-worth (shame being associated with rage directed inward at the self). Thus, unbearable psychological pain that is associated with shame, anger, depression, guilt, or loneliness may be key motivators for suicide. Trumbull tells of one study on an analysis of suicide notes, where suicide victims wrote about a need to escape expected rejection, had worries about becoming dependent, expressed self-deprecation and humiliation, and felt inadequacy both sexually and generally.

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