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Transgender Parenting

Transgender parenting refers to parenting that is done by people who self-identify as transgender. Transgender is an umbrella term for people whose gender expression and/or identity does not match with what is normatively expected of the biological sex with which they were born. This includes a variety of gender identities and experiences such as female-to-male transsexuals, male-to-female transsexuals, intersexed people, crossdressers, drag kings and drag queens, genderqueers, femmes and butches, and many others. Not everyone who identifies as transgendered has lived and lives in their transgender identity all the time. Furthermore, though trans-gender as a term includes a variety of gender identities, it is also a contested term that some people may choose not to identify with once they have changed their biological sex, or transitioned, from the gender that they were born into. As a result, parenting experiences and parenting issues vary widely among different transgender people and their families.

Transgender Parenting Arrangements

While the practice of child rearing by transgendered parents is by no means new, transgender parenting is a relatively modern term. This is because the concept of gender as an identity only emerged in public discourse around the 1950s with media accounts of sexual reassignment surgeries and the beginning of the lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) liberation movement. Since then, a large transgender community there has developed, which has formed national and international organizations, created support services and groups, and has campaigned for civil and legal rights for transgendered people and their families.

Transgender parenting manifests in a variety of familial and parental arrangements. Some trans-gender parents may identify as “mothers” and “fathers” and choose to form traditionally nuclear families consisting of two adults and their biologically related children. Other transgendered individuals may choose to define their relationships with their partners and children in other ways, and form parenting arrangements that include a variety of genders and individuals that are considered “family.” Sometimes these “chosen” families may include individuals who identified as mothers or fathers prior to transitioning, but have since taken on new roles or ways of identifying. There are also many ways in which transgendered people can become parents before and after transitioning. Some trans-gendered people become parents through biological methods such as pregnancy and childbirth. Others become parents though adoption, marriage or other social methods.

Redefining Mother and Father

Through their parenting arrangements, transgender parents, like lesbian, gay, and bisexual (LGB) parents, expand what is meant by the categories of “mother” and “father,” and separate these social terms from biological identities. While traditionally the definition of a mother has been a woman who bears children, in families with transgender parents, male-identified transgendered individuals may also choose to be the ones who get pregnant and give birth. However, not all transgendered parents set out to challenge these terms, and some do not even necessarily see themselves as transgendered, preferring instead to identify as male or female. Further, while some transgendered people choose to identify themselves with the LGBT community, not all do. This is because “transgender” refers to gender identity and not to sexual attraction and behavior. Transgendered people have as much sexual variation as nontransgendered people, and may identify their sexual identity in a variety of ways. Some transgendered people may identify as heterosexual, and thus may not feel that they belong within the LGB community at all.

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