Motherless Daughters

Motherless daughters is a term that can encompass both those whose mothers died due to illness, accident, or suicide as well as those whose mothers are alive but have no contact with their children. The psychological effects of status as a motherless daughter have recently become a popular subject of scholarly research. Research has shown a strong relation between the severity of the impact on a motherless daughter's psychological development and the age at which she lost her mother. Maternal deprivation syndrome examines the effect of the absence of a mother figure on infants. Greater psychological difficulties also result from losing a mother to a traumatic or accidental death or to suicide, which can spur feelings of rejection. The psychological issues motherless daughters face are often reawakened or magnified when they become mothers themselves.

Older advice enouraged motherless daughters to move on after a period of grieving, but more recent research has shown that motherless daughters fare better when maintaining a meaningful connection to their lost mother throughout their lives. Motherless daughters in modern society also have more formal avenues of support, including advice books, Internet sites, support groups, bereavement centers, and counselors that specialize in such loss.

Younger children face more difficulties because they lose their mothers during the important developmental stage of separation and the independent identity formation. Maternal deprivation syndrome focuses on the psychological effects when infants or youg children are deprived of continuous close relationships with their mothers. British psychologist and psychoanalyst John Bowlby first identified this syndrome during his research on developmental psychology and attachment theory. He noted that affected children pass through three stages, consisting of protest, despair, and either detachment or denial. Bowlby believed that maternal deprivation in infancy would impair a child's emotional and cognitive development, likely resulting in feelings of anxiety, a strong need to find love from other sources or difficulty in forming intimate adult relationships, and possible mental illness. A child who suffered maternal deprivation at a later age would be less affected. Many later psychologists feel that Bowlby overstated the effects of maternal deprivation.

Common feelings and emotions that motherless daughters experience include mourning and a sense of emptiness or longing. These feelings often vary in intensity over time. Many motherless daughters also mourn the loss of a role model who could pass on their experiences of womanhood, marriage, and motherhood. Those whose fathers remarry often have trouble bonding with their stepmothers.

Research has shown that motherless daughters also face psychological issues when they become mothers themselves, whether magnified versions of the feelings confronting all new mothers or special feelings unique to their situation as motherless daughters. Some mothers feel anxiety that they lack the skills to become a good mother because they lost their role model or that their mother is not there to offer advice or help. This can be especially true for those who lost their mothers at a young age, as they are more likely to hold an idealized image of their mother that they cannot live up to in their own mothering role. Many motherless daughters who become first-time mothers do not ask for help from other sources, such as family members or friends. Many also feel a renewed sense of loss because their children will not know their grandmother.

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