Self-Verification

Self-Verification Theory suggests that once people develop firmly held beliefs about themselves, they come to prefer that others see them as they see themselves. For example, just as those who see themselves as relatively dominant want others to see them as dominant, so too do those who see themselves as relatively submissive want others to recognize them as submissive. This motive seems to influence relationship quality in that people who are more satisfied when their partners confirm their self-views.

Developed by William Swann, the theory holds that among people with positive self-views, the desire for self-verification works hand in hand with another important motive, the desire for self-enhancement. That is, if the self-view is positive, both the desire for self-verification and self-enhancement will compel people to seek positive feedback. If the self-view is negative, however, the two motives conflict. For those who perceive themselves as disorganized, for example, the desire for self-verification will encourage them to seek evidence that others perceive them as disorganized, but the desire for self-enhancement will motivate them to seek evidence that others perceive them as organized. Self-Verification Theory suggests that because stable self-views guide behavior and provide people with a sense of coherence, stable self-views become intrinsically desirable, and so people with negative self-views will sometimes prefer negative, confirming evaluations over positive but disconfirming ones.

Researchers have reported considerable support for Self-Verification Theory. In one study, participants with positive and negative self-views indicated whether they would prefer to interact with evalua-tors who had favorable or unfavorable impressions of them. Just as people with positive self-views preferred favorable partners, those with negative self-views preferred unfavorable partners. The latter finding showed that self-verification strivings may sometimes override positivity strivings.

The tendency for people with negative self-views to seek and embrace negative evaluations has emerged again and again using many procedural variations. Men and women are equally inclined to display this propensity, and it does not matter whether the self-views refer to characteristics that are relatively immutable (e.g., intelligence) or changeable (e.g., diligence), whether the self-views happen to be highly specific (e.g., athleticism) or global (e.g., low self-esteem, worthlessness), or whether the self-views refer to the individual's personal qualities (e.g., emotionality) or group memberships (e.g., American). Furthermore, when people choose negative evaluators over positive ones, it is not merely to avoid disappointing the positive evaluators, for people with negative self-views choose negative partners even when the alternative is participating in a different experiment.

If people discover that their relationship partner sees them in a manner that challenges their self-view, Self-Verification Theory predicts that they will strive to change their partner's mind. They may, for example, behave in ways that make it clear to their partner that they have the qualities in question. If these efforts fail, people may decide to leave the relationship. That is, when college students find themselves with positive roommates, those with positive self-views prefer to stay, but those with negative self-views make plans to find another roommate. Similarly, just as married people with positive self-views are especially intimate with spouses who perceive them favorably, people with negative self-views withdraw from spouses who perceive them favorably—and in extreme cases, take steps to divorce them. This pattern does not emerge with dating couples, however, apparently because for dating partners, the first priority is keeping the relationship alive, and positive partners seem more apt to remain interested.

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