Guilt and Shame

What is the Difference between Shame and Guilt?

People often use the terms guilt and shame interchangeably. But recent research indicates these are distinct emotions. Some theorists have suggested shame is a more “public” emotion, arising from public exposure and disapproval, whereas guilt is a more “private” experience arising from self-generated pangs of conscience. As it turns out, research has not supported this public-private distinction regarding the actual characteristics of emotion-eliciting situations. For example, when researchers analyze people's descriptions of personal shame and guilt experiences, shame-inducing behaviors are no more likely to occur in public than are guilt-inducing behaviors.

Where does this notion that shame is a more public emotion come from? Although shame- and guilt-inducing situations are equally public in the likelihood that others are present and aware of one's failure or transgression, people pay attention [Page 781]to different things when they feel shame compared with when they feel guilt. When feeling guilt, people are apt to think about their effects on others (e.g., how much a careless remark hurt a friend or how much they disappointed their parents). In contrast, when feeling shame, people are more inclined to worry about how others might evaluate them (e.g., “Do others think I'm a jerk?” “Do my parents see me as a failure?”). In short, when feeling shame, people often focus on others' evaluations, but actual public exposure isn't any more likely than in the case of guilt.

Another basis for distinguishing shame and guilt, and the distinction most strongly supported by social psychological research, centers on the object of one's negative evaluation. According to this view, when people feel guilt, they feel badly about a specific behavior. When people feel shame, they feel badly about themselves. This differential emphasis on self (“I did that horrible thing”) versus behavior (“I did that horrible thing”) may seem minor, but it sets the stage for different emotional experiences and different patterns of motivation and subsequent behavior.

Shame is an especially painful emotion because one's core self, rather than simply one's behavior, is the issue. Shame involves painful scrutiny of the entire self, a feeling that “I am an unworthy, incompetent, or bad person.” People in the midst of a shame experience feel worthless, powerless, and “small.” When feeling shame, people are actually inclined to adopt a “shrinking” posture, as if they wish they could just disappear.

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