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Deception and lying

In the United States, deception and lying are widely condemned but widely practiced in all types of human relationships. The nature of a relationship affects and is affected by the frequency of deception, the motivation for deception, the subject matter of the deception, the interactive manifestations of the deception process, the awareness of and desire to detect deception, the accuracy of that detection, the methods used to detect deception, and the consequences of the deception.

The terms deception and lying are often used interchangeably, but deception is normally considered a broader term, encompassing many tricky and misleading behaviors, including lying. Attributions about the existence of a lie, whether it is good or bad, and to what extent it should be sanctioned are most often based on perceptions of (a) the communicator's intentions and/or motives, (b) the normative expectations for communication in the situation, and (c) the consequences resulting from the communicator's behavior. This entry discusses how lies are studied, why people lie, lies that may initiate and sustain relationships, lie detection, and the relational consequences that accrue from lying.

Studying Lies

In order to systematically study liar behavior, lie detector behavior, and the effects of lies, researchers generate lies in various ways. Videotaping people lying or telling the truth about their identity or their attitudes is the most common method of studying low-stakes lies. High-stakes lies, where success or failure of the lie is associated with major consequences, are often derived from cheating or stealing formats. For example, research participants are given an opportunity to take $50 from a wallet in an isolated room. If they take the money and fool an interviewer by lying about it, they can keep it. If the interviewer catches them in a lie, they are told they will have to sit in a small, dark, and cold room for 2 hours with periodic bursts of high decibel sounds, although no one receives the punishment. The videotapes of these liars have been helpful in generating knowledge, but there are other aspects of relationship lies that are not accounted for with these methods.

For example, individual liar behavior does not help researchers understand how relationship partners jointly construct lies—through an implicit or explicit collaboration. In addition, laboratory-induced lies are limited to a single encounter, whereas family, work, and intimate relationships provide repeated opportunities to interact—providing both the liar and lie detector with additional opportunities to accomplish their goal. Many lies in close relationships do not even involve false accounts; they use secrets and silences in order to create a false reality for their partner. Covert lies (self-deception) and lies designed to benefit one's partner are also types of relationship lies in need of further study.

Motivation for Lying

Lies occur for a variety of reasons, but the most commonly cited motive is to avoid punishment or to protect oneself from harm. Other reasons include trying to obtain something rewarding, to protect or help another person, to win admiration from others, to get out of an awkward or embarrassing social situation, to maintain privacy, to exercise power over others, to fulfill social expectations, or to have fun.

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