Adulthood, Sibling Relationships in

Structural Bases for Sibling Relationships

The study of sibling relationships has taken a back seat to other relationships within families, particularly those between spouses and those between parents and children. However, siblings are a pervasive influence in the life of most adults. Many adults have grown up with one or more siblings. Almost 90 percent of adults in the United States have at least one sibling, according to the 1994 General Social Survey. Sibling relationships result from birth, adoption, marriage, or cohabitation of parents; the terminology varies accordingly. Full siblings have the same mother and father by birth or adoption. Half-siblings have only one parent in common, whereas stepsiblings have no parents in common but are considered siblings because their [Page 42]parents are married to each other. Quasi-siblings have parents who are cohabiting. A sibling may also be informally adopted as is the case of fictive siblings among people who consider themselves to be like brothers or sisters with one another. Finally, additional siblings may be obtained through marriage of one's brother or one's sister as is the case with a brother-in-law and sister-in-law.

Various aspects of the relationship have important implications for the meaning siblings have for each other. In terms of longevity, sibling relationships can span the entire life course, but sometimes they can be temporary (e.g., if a parent's remarriage ends and ties with stepsiblings are not maintained) or relatively recent (e.g., acquiring half- or stepsiblings in adulthood). In general, active relations between full siblings continue throughout adulthood, both because the parents encourage the relationship and because many people feel attached to their siblings and want to be in contact with them.

Whether or not it is long-lived, the sibling relationship is not one of choice but rather depends on parental actions. Whereas this condition has the disadvantage of not being chosen by another (except in the case of fictive siblings) and therefore not necessarily desired, it has the great advantage of providing ready-made social partners. Regardless of how siblings are acquired, the rules about how adult siblings should feel and behave toward one another are unclear or ambiguous.

In American and European societies (as opposed to agricultural societies), whether one feels bonded to one's sibling is up to the individual. At the same time, it is expected that siblings should be involved in one another's lives; they should feel a sense of commitment toward one another. These potentially conflicting expectations may generate feelings of ambivalence. However, most adults feel close to their sibling(s) and consider relationships with their siblings as very important.

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