Acquaintance Process

Conditions for Meeting

In order for two previously unacquainted individuals to meet, at least one of them must first pay attention to the other. Because the world is filled with millions of bits of information, people must be selective in choosing where to focus their attention. In the social world, people who appear unfamiliar and unexpected more easily grab other people's attention. This tendency is important because it induces effort to determine whether the unusual individual is a potential friend or romantic partner, whether the individual presents a threat, or whether the individual is innocuous. People also tend to pay attention to those who appear important or attractive. If a stranger at a party appears to have high status, the likelihood of noticing the person increases—a necessary prerequisite for meeting. The stranger may not become an acquaintance, but the initial condition necessary for affiliation—attention—has been met.

Initiating acquaintance may not always involve choice. There may be other reasons to interact. For example, in situations such as assigned work groups, narrow hallways, and one-on-one meetings, people must interact to accomplish their goals. Scientists label situations containing these strong forces as closed fields. Even speed-dating [Page 22]events consist of a series of closed field interactions that require no initiation to affiliate with multiple available partners, although individuals do decide whether to continue interacting with those they meet during the event. In contrast, situations in which options are available and interaction must be initiated are known as open fields. Open fields are exemplified by environments like parties and nightclubs, as well as more common encounters, such as deciding whether to approach a new coworker to discuss plans for the upcoming weekend or whether to strike up a conversation with a stranger about a shared interest in the slogan on his or her t-shirt. These examples all require initiation of acquaintanceship with desirable people among a host of alternatives.

...