Aging Parents

Throughout our life span, the family is one of the most stable and reliable relationships we experience. Aging parents in America are thriving within the context of their families. Despite the empirical support for this statement, negative stereotypes about older families persist. It is not uncommon to hear about the threats accruing to aging parents as a function of geographic mobility, family breakdown, and social isolation. Concomitantly, older adults may be characterized as “greedy geezers,” placing huge burdens on both the family and society.

Decades of empirical study, however, reveal a picture of families in which aging parents play a key role. Most of this research has been guided by the solidarity model proposed by Bengtson and Schrader in 1982. This model examines intergenerational relations in terms of normative solidarity, affectional solidarity, consensual solidarity, associational solidarity, functional solidarity, and structural solidarity.

Normative solidarity refers to perceptions that one is experiencing usual or typical life events. Indeed, the phenomenon of aging parents is normative. Most older Americans are parents, with 75% to 80% having at least one living child. This, coupled with increased longevity, increase the likelihood of living in a four-or five-generation family. Moreover, this trend is expected to continue; by the year 2020, 60% of women age 50 and older are expected to have at least one living parent. Thus, one can simultaneously have aging parents and be an aging parent.

Affectional solidarity refers to shared feelings of esteem and affection. The parent-child bond is the strongest familial bond (outside of marriage) and continues to be important to both children and aging parents. However, there is some evidence that these relations may be more important to aging parents, giving rise to the “intergenerational stake” hypothesis. This states that relative to their children, aging parents report higher levels of affection and a stronger desire to maintain contact with other generations. This trend extends to the middle generation, who value their relationships with their own children more highly than they value their relationships with their parents.

Consensual solidarity refers to the degree to which generations agree about fundamental social, cultural, and political views. We know that attitudes and expectations are in flux, making it difficult to adequately gauge the effects of consensual solidarity. Some research suggests that this aspect of intergenerational solidarity is especially important for immigrants and first-generation families.

Associational solidarity is indexed by the frequency of contact between the generations. Associational solidarity is high, with 80% of older parents having some contact with an adult child at least once a week. Not surprisingly, there are gender differences in the frequency of such interactions, with aging mothers reporting higher levels of contact than aging fathers.

Functional solidarity, the exchange of goods and services, flows bidirectionally across contiguous generations. Aging parents may provide child care, financial assistance, and advice; adult children may provide help with household chores, home repairs, and personal care. In late life, parents tend to receive more than they give. When aging parents require assistance, it is family members who provide the bulk of that care.

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