Embarrassment

Accounts of Embarrassment

There are two prominent accounts of what triggers embarrassment. According to the social evaluation model, embarrassment is elicited by the anticipation of negative evaluation by others. People become embarrassed when they perceive that the social image they want to project has been undermined and that others are forming negative impressions of them. However, this model does not readily account for all cases of embarrassment. For example, embarrassment can occur in situations that are entirely positive and that do not reflect negatively on the self in any way, such as when friends sing “Happy Birthday to You.”

According to another view, the awkward interaction or dramaturgic account, embarrassment arises when one anticipates the disruption of smooth social interaction or when one is unclear about the social expectations governing behavior. Based on this theory, embarrassment is not due to a person worrying about making a bad impression per se but rather is due to not knowing how to behave. Research suggests that a single theory probably is not adequate to account for all incidents of embarrassment and that both of these accounts have merit.

Development of Embarrassment

Embarrassment develops later than many emotions (such as anger, fear, and jealousy), usually emerging between 15 and 24 months of life. It appears to require that a child has some clear knowledge of the self (e.g., shows the ability to recognize that the reflection in the mirror is of the self). The importance of the awareness of the self is inherent in the common description of embarrassment as a self-conscious emotion.

Functions of Embarrassment

Relative to living alone, group living provides many advantages but also has its challenges. According to several theorists, embarrassment evolved as an instrument to help undo or prevent negative social consequences in situations where a person has unintentionally violated a social norm. The basic premise is that those who experienced and expressed distress over concerns with others' impressions of them were more likely to survive as reproductive members of the group than those who acted with disregard for others' opinions. Disregard for others' reactions might have led one to be ostracized from the group or perhaps even killed.

Embarrassment likely has three basic functions. First, it serves as an appeasement gesture to others by signaling that the violation was unintended and that it will not likely occur again. Second, the intense dread of experiencing this emotion likely deters one from repeating whatever behavior triggered the emotion. Third, embarrassment motivates an individual to undo the social damage and restore the regard of others.

Findings from several studies are consistent with such functional accounts. For example, displaying embarrassment after an accidental mishap can lead to one being liked more and to children being punished less by their mothers, which provides some support for the theory that embarrassment is akin to an appeasement gesture, triggering a positive [Page 282]response in onlookers. Research has also found that embarrassment can motivate individuals to engage in more prosocial behaviors such as volunteering. Other research suggests that expressions of embarrassment may have a cathartic effect. For example, people who were given the opportunity to show their embarrassment got over it more quickly than those who were not given such an opportunity. Thus, although people dislike showing embarrassment, it may be that once embarrassment is triggered, it is difficult to stop feeling uncomfortable until they behave in a functionally appropriate manner. Further evidence for this idea comes from work that finds that people are particularly likely to engage in apologies or acts of remediation after doing something embarrassing.

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