I and Thou

I and Thou is the most durable and important conceptual contribution of the 20th-century philosopher of dialogue, Martin Buber, and the title of his most famous book. As often happens with such terms, it became so well known and seemingly accessible that it developed its own reputation as a pop-culture slogan. Self-help gurus and critics alike have used it in ways that surely would have surprised Buber and other Continental philosophers, such as Gabriel Marcel and Hans-Georg Gadamer, who developed similar concepts and applied them in sophisticated ways.

Although it can be mischaracterized and even parodied, I and Thou is not a simplistic exhortation to love your neighbor, to avoid confrontation or conflict, or to be your most honest and genuine self. It is neither an uncritical celebration of subjectivity nor an attack on rationality. Buber was not advocating mystical experience or a near-religious obligation to sustain intimate relationships with people who should be treated as solemn “Thous.” He was creating nothing less than an ontology of, or way of characterizing, communication that could ground the human sciences: “All real living is meeting,” he wrote in I and Thou, in a line that captures its theme. At the center of this ontology was neither the individual self, as I, nor others with whom the individual interacts. Buber focused instead on relationships and relational attitudes—the often forgotten realm of the “between.” This entry briefly discusses Buber's biography, describes the basic I-Thou concept, and explores several relevant implications for communication theory.