Reciprocity

Reciprocity is the state of mutually addressing the same attitudes or feelings as another. It indicates an equal exchange. This implies intersubjectivity and interaction not only between individuals, but also between groups. It may, therefore, be applied to many fields of social activity and has acquired special importance in psychology, education, ethics, politics, and law.

Although the quality of the reciprocal attitudes or feelings is neutral (there may be a positive or a negative mutual exchange), the term is most commonly used for sharing something considered to be positive.

Reciprocity is one of the first elements that contributes to a child's psychological, physical, and social development by the spontaneous imitation of the parents' attitudes, expressions, and movements. The feeling of reciprocal love between parent and child is one of the most important factors for the creation of an equilibrated individual personality. Besides the emotional flourishing it creates, it establishes a psychic environment of security and confidence, which is vital for young human beings and of crucial weight for their future evolution. On this basis of reciprocal confidence and goodwill is founded any other [Page 1994]successful educative relationship in the following years of the human life.

The “reciprocity of consciences” consists of sharing the same ideas, values, or points of view. It facilitates mutual empathy, the capacity of “putting oneself in the other's place,” integrating the other's sentiments and positions, and may thus create a sense of harmonious unity between individuals. In this sense, the Other becomes like “another Self,” an alter ego, who is felt at the same time as a distinct person and as a part of ourselves.

This kind of reciprocity is notably present between friends. Aristotle (384–322 BC) was one of the first thinkers who insisted on this point. In his ethical works, he considers the best kind of friendship to be the one that is founded on mutual affection, due to the virtuous character of both persons. Many centuries later, Michel de Montaigne (1533–1592) omitted the notion of moral value of the character from reciprocity in friendship—a human relationship for which he had a high consideration—putting it beyond any social conventions. He believes that true friends realize equality by the purest of all the different kinds of love. They love each other just because they are who they are, and this engenders all the pleasure of sharing. The reciprocity of feelings of love, accompanied this time by desire, is also the basis of the amorous relationship. Eros without response results in frustration and distress, which have too often been the subject of literature. The contemporary philosopher who has particularly valorized reciprocity as a central notion of his thought is Paul Ricoeur (1913–). Considering that the previous theories on self-definition and self-conscience, as well as on the foundation of ethical behavior, have stayed within the limits of egocentrism, he insisted on the definition of the self as a structure derived from “being together.” Self-esteem and respect of the Other manifest themselves in a reciprocity that may be conceived as a “symmetrical” relationship, as it doesn't accentuate the role of the “I,” as opposed to “the Other.” Ricoeur proposes to replace the “I” with the “self” in our way of thinking, as a means of reestablishing the fundamental resemblance among persons: the other is a “self” as much as “myself,” and can also say “I.” Only a relation of reciprocity may establish the feeling of “being the same” as the other and create the sense of equality and friendliness among people. Even for each one of us separately, the maintenance of a stable identity (the continuous “similarity to oneself”) is achieved, according to this thinker, thanks to a kind of “promise” given to someone who counts for us. Ethical behavior is therefore more than an “obligation”; it is a free mutual affectionate consent.

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