Summary
Contents
‘Over 20 years Dr Nigel Mellor has developed strategies that … effectively change the child's behaviour’ – The Independent
‘Full of hope … for parents [in] a desperate world. Advice is given with understanding, warmth and a real appreciation of what life is like when you have an impossible child’ – Times Educational Supplement
‘A very practical, down-to-earth and humorous approach… techniques that harassed parents can use… this book is impressive’ – Educational Psychology in Practice
‘Extremely useful… I recommend this book as a manual for parenthood. Humour makes it an entertaining, yet informative read’ – The Teacher
‘Highly enjoyable…delivers key messages superbly well… points are delivered with warmth and sensitivity’ – British Journal of Special Education
‘Nigel Mellor's] techniques will help you to turn your child from a monster into an angel’ – Daily Express
‘Who's pulling the strings? … Strategies [for] exasperated parents’ – Yorkshire Post
‘They are driving parents mad … but there is a consistent approach that helps’ – Birmingham Post
‘Back to your granny's wise words - the book is packed with real life examples … [from] families and their moments of sheer desperation’ – Sheffield Star
‘The parents [Dr Mellor] sees are in a terrible state … [his] help is practical and focused on the future rather than past mistakes’ – Newcastle Journal
‘I immediately felt a lot of empathy. All in all an excellent book’ – Special
‘Up-front and practical approach to this all-encompassing challenge’ – Education and Health
‘A very valuable resource’ – Children are Unbeatable Alliance
‘Empowers parents … would be ideal at parent workshops’ – Special Needs Information Press
‘A panacea for many parents … an immensely readable book’ – Young Minds
‘Nigel Mellor's easy-going and empathetic style of writing [is] both refreshing and eminently readable … the book is shot through with humour, modesty and encouragement and I highly recommend it’ – Contact a Family
‘This unique book provides… a practical guide packed with step-by- step instructions backed by a wealth of examples drawn from real families’ – My Weekly.
‘Insightful instruction … Nigel Mellor is an expert in attention seeking … timely and well written’ – Metro
The author of the best-selling book, Attention Seeking, gets right to the heart of these topics in a way that readers can quickly grasp.
Each topic is explained and followed by a discussion and advice on ways to troubleshoot the problem. Topics covered include:
misbehaviour; praise; punishment; ignoring.
The book provides parents, teachers and psychologists with a user-friendly, practical guide to the perplexing problem of attention seeking. Sharing this book will allow parents and professionals to go forward and plan for improved behaviour.
The good the bad and the irritating
Ignoring
Ignoring
If we decide to try to ignore some minor piece of irritating behaviour we must first be aware that this is actually one of the hardest parts of the approach. I want to spend a great deal of time examining this aspect. This repeated, microscopic focus on tiny details is essential. The most “obvious” techniques are those we most often miscalculate, simply because they seem so easy. But they aren't.
Most children can read adults like a book. They know our every emotion. They know exactly what gets under our skin and when to have the maximum effect (when it's most inconvenient for us, naturally). It's not that they plan this. They aren't clones of a Child of the Devil. They just learn it, almost ...