How do gay men respond to controlling notions of masculinity in society and stereotypes of gay sexuality? This book explores the ways in which gay men in the United States engage in, contest and modify these notions and develop a sense of masculine identity. The book examines the creation of identity through the everyday lives of gay men: their work; home; community; and relationships.

“One of the Guys”: Instrumentality and Intimacy in Gay Men's Friendships with Straight Men

“One of the guys”: Instrumentality and intimacy in gay men's friendships with straight men

Why would one subscribe to this obligation to choose? One can never stabilize oneself in a position; one must define the use that one makes of it according to the moment.

—Michel Foucault, “History and Homosexuality” (1989, p. 369)

This chapter discusses men's problems of gender and sexual difference as found in friendships between straight and gay men. Although problems of straight men's relative homophobia and heterosexism are central in this intersection—to the extent that masculinity itself is most often defined in heterosexual terms and contexts—I would like to more address the often-neglected area of gay men's stake in gender.

Surely, ...

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