- Subject index
In Violent Emotions, Retzinger explores the role of hidden alienation and shame as the source of repetitious cycles of conflict. Theories and research from large-scale conflict, marital disputes, and communication processes are reviewed and provide a background for a new integrative theory developed by the author. In testing her theory of prolonged conflict, Retzinger utilizes complex verbal and nonverbal coding schemes, identifies specific emotions within the context of marital disputes, and points out recurring patterns preceding the escalation of an argument. She provides exemplars of how this theory works through an intensive analysis of conflict exchange in four case studies and uses vivid descriptions to illustrate important points about communication in intimate relationships. Violent Emotions provides much needed data that will be useful for preventive ...
Chapter 5: David and Colleen: Interminable Quarrel
David and Colleen: Interminable Quarrel
All understanding is at the same time misunderstanding, all agreement in thought and feeling is also a parting of the ways. (Steiner, 1981, p. 173)
David, 38, and Colleen, 35 (pseudonyms), are a white middle-class couple; they have been married for 15 years, the first marriage for both. David is a salesperson for mobile homes and a real estate developer, Colleen is a dancer/fitness instructor, currently unemployed. David has been the primary financial provider in this relationship; his annual income is $30,000. He has three years of college; she has a B. A. in liberal studies. They have no children.
The problems in David and Colleen's marriage have been left unresolved. The two claim to share the same ...