Chapter 1: “Seamless Souls”: An Introduction to Men's Friendships Next Chapter

Peter M. Nardi

In: Men's Friendships

Chapter 1: “Seamless Souls”: An Introduction to Men's Friendships

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“Seamless Souls”: An Introduction to Men's Friendships
“Seamless souls”: An introduction to men's friendships

When Montaigne described friendship as “souls that mingle and blend with each other so completely that they efface the seam that joined them,” he was talking about his friendship with another man. The images of friendships in both myth and everyday life were historically male-dominated. They were characterized in terms of bravery, loyalty, duty, and heroism (see Hammond & Jablow, 1987). This explains why women were often seen as not capable of having “true” friendships. But today the images of ideal friendship are often expressed in terms of women's traits: intimacy, trust, caring, and nurturing, thereby excluding the more traditional men from true friendship (see Sapadin, 1988).

Attempts to alter how men construct ...

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